Treat Me Well And Keep Me Clean, I'Ll Not Tell Anyone, What I Have Seen!

Toilet Slogans – Toilet Quotes – Funny and Inspiring

World Toilet Day is celebrated on 19 November to promote cleanliness and building more toilets for public use.

Following are the toilet quotes, toilet slogan and funny toilet slogans with images.

SCROLL DOWN for Toilet Quotes

Funny and Motivational Toilet Slogans – Clean Toilets Slogans

A Nice Hot Bath Will Fix Just About Anything!

Arise, Go Forth And Conquer !!

Avoid A Dirty Scene, Keep This Bathroom Clean

Bare Bottoms Welcomed Here !

How Long Is A Minute Depends On Which Side Of The Door You’Re On.

Bathroom Rules:  WASH-BRUSH-FLOSS-FLUSH !!

Be A Sweetie….Close The Seatie !

Bear Hugs And Back Rubs Welcome

Dentist – Oral Care Slogans and Quotes

Diapers, Sanitary Napkins And Tampons You Can’T Flush Or Else You’Ll Make The Toilet Gush – Justwilliam

Don’T Be In A Rush, Remember To Flush

NOTICE- Replacing The Toilet Paper Roll Will Not Cause Brain Damage!

Don’T Be Mean, Keep This Bathroom Clean

GENTLEMEN:  Your Aim Will Help…Stand Closer; It’S Shorter Than You Think.

Go To The Loo To Take A Poo!

Happiness Is A Long, Hot Bubble Bath.

Here Is Sit Here Broken Hearted, Payed A Dime But Only Farted. Next Time I Will Take My Chance, Save A Dime And Crap My Pants!

GENTLEMEN Your Aim Will Help…Stand Closer; It’S Shorter Than You Think

How Long Is A Minute?  Depends On Which Side Of The Door You’Re On.

I Aim To Keep This Bathroom Clean.  Your Aim Will Help !

I Believe The Only Time

I See Londan I See France I See Your Underpants!

Be A Sweetie….Close The Seatie

If Its Brown Flush It Down

If There’S A Ring In The Tub,

If You Sprinkle When You Tinkle Be A Sweetie And Wipe The Seatie!!

In This Land Of Fun And Sun, We Flush On Two, Not One.

Our Aim Is To Keep The Toilets Clean – Your Aim Will Help!

Is When I’M In The Bathroom.

It Matters Not How Long U Stay,Just Flush Before You Go Away.

LADIES:  Please Remain Seated For The Entire Performance.

No Job Is Finished Until The Paperwork Is Done !

NOTICE: Replacing The Toilet Paper Roll Will Not Cause Brain Damage !

Diapers, Sanitary Napkins And Tampons You Can’T Flush Or Else You’Ll Make The Toilet Gush

Our Aim Is To Keep The Toilets Clean – Your Aim Will Help!

Please Answer It !!

Please God….Tell Mommy That Cowboys Don’T Take Baths !!

Rub-A-Dub-Dub…Please Scrub The Tub !

Happiness Is A Long, Hot Bubble Bath.

Save Water…Shower With A Friend !!

The Only Time The World Beats A Path To Your Door Is If You’Re In The Bathroom.

The World Beats A Path To My Door

This Is A Do-It-Yourself Bathroom. No Maid Service Available.

France Is The Country Where The Money Falls Apart And You Can'T Tear The Toilet Paper. » Billy Wilder

Treat Me Well And Keep Me Clean, I’ll Not Tell Anyone, What I Have Seen !

We Aim To Please….You Aim Too Please…!!

Toilet Quotes

“Why do I continue making movies? Making movies is better than cleaning toilets.” » Klaus Kinski

“Online, you’re providing each other with the good aspects of being together as far as communication and support, but you don’t have to deal with the realities of paying bills together, or being annoyed when they leave the toilet seat up or don’t put the food away in the fridge.” » Nev Schulman

Growing Up, I Had A Front Row Seat To Seeing Two People Work Really Hard. My Dad Scrubbed Toilets At A Private Catholic School For A While, And That Was To Help Me Get Through School. » Mia Love

“I refuse to go into a fast-food outlet – to use the toilet even – in case anyone got the wrong idea and thought I was sneaking in a quick burger.” » Jonny Wilkinson

“Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet.” » Chuck Palahniuk

“I used to always sit in church looking out the windows at the boys, wondering if I could make an excuse to go out and, you know, go to the bathroom because all the outdoor toilets. But anyhow, I was only going out to see the boys.” » Dolly Parton

“The first thing I did when I decided that I was going to dive into the world of poop was look at who was doing stuff in that world. The first I came across was the World Toilet Organization. So one of the first things I did was to go to their annual show in Moscow.” » Rose George


“I’m cleaning toilets for $30 a day, because I needed that $30, and people are pointing at me, saying, Look at the big movie star. Look where he is now. I just said, I’m where God put me.” » Willie Aames

“I think toilets are more important than temples. No matter how many temples we go to, we are not going to get salvation. We need to give priority to toilets and cleanliness.” » Jairam Ramesh

“Don’t let yourself fall into ’empty.’ Keep cash in the house. Keep gas in your tank. Keep an extra roll of toilet paper squirreled away. Keep your phone charged.” » Gretchen Rubin

“Rules governing defecation, hygiene, and pollution exist in every culture at every period in history. It may in fact be the foundation of civilization: What is toilet training if not the first attempt to turn a child into an acceptable member of society.” » Rose George

Avoid A Dirty Scene, Keep This Bathroom Clean

“I am a big fan of long drop, composting toilets – I like the cycle of using waste. When you have experienced one and seen what comes out of the bottom, it is amazing stuff. It’s the most beautiful, driest, sweet-smelling compost.” » Kevin McCloud

“When somebody follows you 20 blocks to the pharmacy, where they watch you buy toilet paper, you know your life has changed.” » Jennifer Aniston

“You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.” » George Carlin

“My favorite affirmation when I feel stuck or out of sorts is: Whatever I need is already here, and it is all for my highest good. Jot this down and post it conspicuously throughout your home, on the dashboard of your car, at your office, on your microwave oven, and even in front of your toilets!” » Wayne Dyer

A Nice Hot Bath Will Fix Just About Anything

“No innovation in the past 200 years has done more to save lives and improve health than the sanitation revolution triggered by invention of the toilet. But it did not go far enough. It only reached one-third of the world.” » Sylvia Mathews Burwell

“I’m way better in person than I am on things like Twitter. I know Twitter is the best and fastest way to connect with fans who really appreciate you but I’m still not cool with it – although I am trying! I try my best but I’m a one-on-one person and I don’t want to tell people I’m on the toilet or I just brushed my teeth.” » Nicole Scherzinger

“I’d find it demeaning to be cleaning toilets.” » Jack Kevorkian

“As education and employment secretary in 1997, I inherited hundreds of schools where the roofs leaked, the windows rattled, and they relied entirely on outside toilets.” » David Blunkett

You Know An Odd Feeling Sitting On The Toilet Eating A Chocolate Candy Bar. » George Carlin

“Schools across India do not have teachers, libraries, playing grounds and even toilets. I do not want to see empty classrooms, empty libraries. I do not want to see cattle grazing on fields meant to be cricket or football grounds.” » Sachin Tendulkar

“People don’t want to hear about me having leather walls or gold toilets.” » Kevin Hart

“I was used to getting changed in pub toilets before going on set. Then suddenly I had studios in L.A. advising me on my hair.” » Harry Treadaway

“Today, the degradation of the inner life is symbolized by the fact that the only place sacred from interruption is the private toilet.” » Lewis Mumford

Water Quotes and Save Water Slogans

“I’ve found that it’s actually more of a disability to be tall than short. I have no problem fitting into plane toilets etc, and the adaptations made for wheelchair users – such as the lowering of bank machines – work for me as well.” » Warwick Davis

Why Do I Continue Making Movies Making Movies Is Better Than Cleaning Toilets. » Klaus Kinski

“Tonight the city is full of morgues, and all the toilets are overflowing. There’s shopping malls coming out of the walls, as we walk out among the manure. That’s why I pay no mind.” » Beck

“I really can’t be bothered going to a barber. And shaving every morning, that’s nightmarish. I spent my teenage years covered in tiny little bits of toilet paper.” » Alan Moore

“I cleaned toilets and shined shoes.” » Rick Santorum

“It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.” » Rod Serling

Schools Across India Do Not Have Teachers, Libraries, Playing Grounds And Even Toilets. » Sachin Tendulkar

“When you look at the actual data on technological innovation, one thing you see is that what I call the ‘low-hanging fruit’ has been exhausted. So radio, flush toilets, electricity, and automobiles – a lot of very basic inventions – have spread to almost all households.” » Tyler Cowen

“The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on.” » Ronnie Barker

“Acting is invigorating. But I don’t analyse it too much. It’s like a dog smelling where it’s going to do its toilet in the morning.” » Liam Neeson

“Where do you get lumpy tiles? Well, of course, you don’t. But I get a lot of toilets, and so you just dispatch a toilet with a hammer, and then you have lumpy tiles.” » Dan Phillips

Save Water…Shower With A Friend !!

“During the 1970s and 1980s, Congress distributed more than $60 billion to cities to make sure that what goes into toilets, industrial drains and street grates would not endanger human health.” » Charles Duhigg Toilet Posters

“Poop humor is fun. If you do the toilet scenes well and commit to them, they can be really, really powerful.” » Sandra Bullock

“Castro couldn’t even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet.” » Richard M. Nixon

“There are some ghost stories in Japan where – when you are sitting in the bathroom in the traditional style of the Japanese toilet – a hand is actually starting to grab you from beneath. It’s a very scary story.” » Shigeru Miyamoto

I'M Cleaning Toilets For $30 A Day, Because I Needed That $30, And People Are Pointing At Me, Saying, Look At The Big Movie Star. Look Where He Is Now. I Just Said, I'M Where God Put Me. » Willie Aames

“France is the country where the money falls apart and you can’t tear the toilet paper.” » Billy Wilder

“As a wheelchair user, I am utterly obsessed with toilets, and all my friends know it. A simple invitation to the pub is consistently followed by, ‘Do you know if they have an accessible toilet?'” » Stella Young

“Growing up, I had a front row seat to seeing two people work really hard. My dad scrubbed toilets at a private Catholic school for a while, and that was to help me get through school.” » Mia Love

“In the period where I had to live the life of a citizen – a life where, like everybody else, I did tons of laundry and cleaned toilet bowls, changed hundreds of diapers and nursed children – I learned a lot.” » Patti Smith

“We were called The Toilets originally – we were flushed with success.” » Mike Peters

I Think Toilets Are More Important Than Temples. No Matter How Many Temples We Go To, We Are Not Going To Get Salvation. We Need To Give Priority To Toilets And Cleanliness. » Jairam Ramesh

“I can say with a solid degree of authority that I am a selfish person. I spontaneously forget the names of more people than not, unless I want to make out with them. I will take the last square of toilet paper off the roll without thinking twice. I tip taxi drivers so poorly I’m amazed none of them have run over my foot while speeding off.” » Sloane Crosley

“My goal is that after seeing ‘Grand Canyon,’ every person in the audience will go home knowing they have to conserve water: even something as simple as installing a low-flow toilet or showerhead, or turning off the faucet while they’re brushing their teeth.” » Greg MacGillivray

“Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.” » Joey Bishop

“If they had told me I was the janitor and would have to mop up and clean the toilets after the show in order to play, I probably would have done it.” » Bruce Springsteen

“In awe, I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebony void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang, for ever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought… I must put a roof on this toilet.” » Les Dawson

Treat Me Well And Keep Me Clean, I'Ll Not Tell Anyone, What I Have Seen!

“I did an internship at the Ardent theatre company in Philly after dropping out of college. I was earning $165 a week building sets and cleaning the toilets. Cleaning toilets is a good way of getting in touch with your creativity. That’s when you find out if you got anything going on in your head.” » Jill Scott